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00:00:25
Hello?
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Hi.
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Happy Tuesday!
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Happy Tuesday.
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It is.
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A few days until Juneteenth.
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Happy Juneteenth!
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Very true.
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Happy Juneteenth.
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and a few days until the 50th anniversary of Jaws.
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That's true.
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That's why we're here.
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That is why we're here.
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We're going to talk about Jaws today.
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All of them.
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All four of them.
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all four.
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I'm personally looking forward to it.
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I concur.
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I am as well.
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Okay.
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This is also our 125th episode.
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That's kind of fun.
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I didn't realize that it fell on the Jaws marathon, but very fun timing.
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I like that.
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Yeah.
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It's a lot of a lot of divisibles by five.
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I was gonna say milestones, but yeah, it's kinda the same thing.
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Yeah.
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Mm-hmm.
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Well, before we start, you have something to say.
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I do?
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Well yeah, you've been...
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prepping us for your rant about sharks in the media.
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Oh, right, right.
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Yeah, we're not going to do news today.
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We're just going to hop in because we are talking about four movies.
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And we thought we'd talk first about the perception of sharks in media.
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I said I was going to go on a big rant today.
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And I have to admit that I started doing research on the effect that Jaws had on the shark populations because I was like, this will not stand.
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I will get my rant out.
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and I was promptly proven wrong.
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I am not immune to propaganda.
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And apparently Jaws really didn't have that big of an impact on sharks is what I found out.
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Or at least an impact that we can really measure.
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So shark populations did start going down after the movie Jaws, but they were already going down before Jaws came out too because of overfishing.
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So that was kind of a whole thing.
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And I think the sharpest dip that they found actually happened before Jaws came out.
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like not that long before it came out.
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And also the original writer of the book.
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Peter Benchley.
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Peter Benchley, thank you.
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I forgot his name and I didn't have it pulled up.
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He said that he wrote the book, well, he was commissioned to write the book, but he also said that the idea of it kind of came from the perception of ground sharks that already
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existed.
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So people were already pretty scared of sharks, which is why he wrote the novel.
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He did say he later regretted it because he didn't want to increase that.
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And he also got a lot of things wrong.
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That was back when people thought that sharks still hunted people.
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for food or sport, and they don't, we know that now.
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um But anyways, needless to say, there's no real way for us to measure if people hated sharks as much before Jaws as after because we didn't measure it beforehand, because we
00:03:27
didn't know that Jaws was gonna be the first summer blockbuster ever.
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Anyways, so that's my little corrections corner, I guess, is that I learned that that is a media myth that I always thought was true.
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And now I know it's not.
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Or at least not provable.
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Okay.
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but I still think people should be nice to sharks because I like them.
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Yeah, definitely.
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I still have some negative connotation with Jaws and the issue of sharks.
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Jaws was a movie to popularize the shark man-eating trope.
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There were a few films prior to it, but that trope was popularized definitely by Jaws and it obviously portrays sharks negatively and in a time where not a lot was known about
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them.
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So it really did set the stage and put a spotlight.
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a negative spotlight on sharks.
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96 % of films after Jaws portraying sharks, shark-human interactions are negative.
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They're threatening.
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How many before?
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there weren't that many before.
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The JAWS is essentially the first.
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Well, and like I say, some of these things could could have it could have been like more of a causation, not a correlation.
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All the way around.
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it, it's so hard to measure because we weren't measuring before JAWS came out.
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But I think you're right in that it definitely could have, even if it wasn't directly responsible for a decrease in the population, I think it's fair to say that it at least
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made people not care that much about it.
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I think a lot of people, whether they felt strongly about sharks before or after it,
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This scared a lot of people.
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Yeah.
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And that's...
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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And that's sort of where I'm leading is that the negative perception that started with Jaws means people overlook the conservation crises like shark finning and such, because
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it's a lot easier to push for conservation of species like pandas who are, you know, cute and cuddly.
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Yeah.
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Despite being assholes,
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majority of the time pandas are not
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what we're not gonna do is start a slander on pandas.
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can spare some panda conservation if it means that shark conservation increases.
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No, we can have both.
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we should have.
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Another kind of fun, interesting thing that I learned, um and it was actually really shocking, there's a huge study about it, is that shark week is actually more likely to
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have caused a negative impact to sharks than jaws.
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Which is crazy because Shark Week is so informative.
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Like that made me like sharks even more.
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Well, so only 50 % of episodes on Shark Week, which is the longest running TV special of all time, by the way, 33 years, only 50 % of episodes even briefly mention conservation as
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a requirement for maintaining shark populations, which by the way, since Jaws came out, and again, it's not because of Jaws necessarily, but since Jaws came out in 50 years,
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shark populations have declined more than 70%.
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One in three species are threatened by extinction.
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And only 50 % of the episodes of Shrek even mention conservation as a necessity.
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then only 16 % don't even mention any scientific research at all.
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Damn.
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I was actually very surprised to see how little of Shark Week is focused on conservation when that's kind of the point that should be the point.
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Yeah, you would think.
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It's not though, it's for views.
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Capitalism, baby.
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Let's go.
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Speaking of capitalism, let's talk about Jaws and the Sequel.
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Yeah, we should.
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Let's start with the OG, huh?
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Yeah, we're gonna we're gonna do some summaries and then we'll talk about fun facts and then we'll do summaries and fun facts and we're gonna go through all four of the movies.
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So starting with Jaws.
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The OG.
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Jaws is a 1975 horror thriller directed by Steven Spielberg and based on the 1974 novel by Peter Benchley when a young woman is killed by a shark while skinny dipping near the New
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England tourist town of Amity Island.
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Police Chief Martin Brody wants to close the beaches, but Mayor Larry Vaughn overrules him, fearing that the loss of tourist revenue will cripple the town.
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Icthyologist Matt Hooper and Grizzled Ship Captain Quint offer to help Brody capture the killer beast, and the trio engage in an epic battle of man versus nature.
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That's from Google.
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Jaws stars Roy Scheider, Richard Dreyfuss, Robert Shaw, and Lorraine Gary, and has one of the most iconic recognizable movie themes of all time, composed by John Williams.
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had a, I'm do that again, it had a seven to $9 million budget and grossed $476 million at the box office, making it unsurprisingly the most lucrative of the franchise.
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It is also by far the highest rate of the films with an 8.1 out of 10 on IMDB, a 3.9 of five on Letterboxd and a 90 % audience and 97 % critic score on Rotten Tomatoes.
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Nice.
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Yep.
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Yeah, I wrote down, or guess compiled all of the little lists and awards and all that stuff that it got and then I was like, you know what, I'm not gonna go through that.
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I'm not gonna tell everybody that because, oh no, I just figured like any list that you think it's on, it is.
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It's one of the most highly regarded films in history.
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So take that as you will, it was at the Oscars, it's in the 1001 movies, it's in all of it.
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It's preserved.
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Everything.
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Yeah, people love it.
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Everyone, audiences and critics.
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audiences and critics alike.
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Yeah, I was extremely shocked to see that this movie was PG-13 or PG because PG-13 didn't exist yet.
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em Which I think we've run into that before.
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Psycho maybe was not R but rated PG.
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Yeah.
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think so.
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But yeah, we've definitely covered movies where PG-13 just wasn't around yet, so.
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which funny enough, it was actually Steven Spielberg's own film, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.
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That was the first that was the movie that changed the rating system.
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It was the first PG-13 film in 1984.
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Very fun, interesting fact.
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That is a fun fact.
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One thing I didn't know about Spielberg and this movie, he was 28 when he made this.
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A child.
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I can't believe I'm older than Steven Spielberg was when he made Jaws.
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He had already made Jaws by this point in his life.
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And what am I doing?
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Nothing.
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Honestly, yeah, I think of directors as elders, elders that have done their time in the industry.
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necessarily think of them all as elders, but I do have this idea in my head where I'm like, this movie was old-er.
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So the director's older than me now, so he must have been older than me when he did anything in his life.
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You know what I mean?
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He didn't exist before his like 60s maybe.
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So that's where I'm at.
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And that's incorrect, but I also, you know...
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when I worked and someone would start after me, they were younger than me.
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Anybody who started before me was older than me.
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And that's just how my mind worked.
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And it doesn't, it's not true, but that's how it worked in my brain.
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But yeah, he was the youngest person to direct a film that opened at number one in the box office for this movie.
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And he held the record for nearly 40 years until Josh Trank took over when he was 27 and Chronicle came out, which by the way, have you ever seen Chronicle?
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okay.
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I don't even know what it's about.
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A newspaper, perhaps?
00:11:51
No, it's about teens who get superpowers.
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okay, that sounds fun.
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It's very good, but I always thought of it as like an underrated gem.
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I didn't realize that it was number one at the box office.
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That doesn't feel like an underrated gem, but it's weird because now I feel like nobody talks about that movie, and they should, because it's good.
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Yeah, I don't even think I had heard of it until right now.
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Interesting.
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Interesting.
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Also, 28-year-old Steven Spielberg wasn't even there to film the last, like the pivotal scene in the movie where the shark explodes.
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Yeah, he dipped out early.
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Yeah, he was afraid of the crew pulling a prank on him.
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So he just hopped on a plane and left.
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Like, Irish goodbye his own movie.
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Yeah, well I think they were gonna throw him in the water and that was the prank, which doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
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But apparently then he dressed up in his nicest clothes and then as they were starting to shoot it, he got on a boat and like drove away and was like, good luck, I'm out.
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You'll never see me again.
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And just left and got on a plane while they continued shooting.
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really the prank, that's crazy because tensions were high while they were filming this.
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And during production at some point, Roy Scheider decided that he would start a food fight to sort of like loosen everybody's tension, helped everybody let off a little bit of
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steam.
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And then everybody jumped in a pool, including Steven Spielberg, jumped in.
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a pool to rinse off so he'd already done that.
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I don't know that's weird that he was afraid of going in the water.
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Yeah, you would think that they got wet multiple times during filming, so...
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You sure would.
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Who's to say?
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Yeah, this was definitely, I think a lot of people who know about Jaws know that there were a lot of issues with filming.
00:14:04
It did not go smoothly.
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The shark malfunctioned a lot.
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It wasn't tested in salt water, so that became an issue.
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They weren't getting any shots.
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Spielberg said they were lucky if they got four hours of filming done on a day.
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On a good day, he said they'd get five shots in, which is...
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Yeah.
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The schedule expanded from 52 days to 155 days, so about tripled.
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Yeah, half a year.
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Yeah.
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And at one point the ship actually sank and they thought that they lost like an entire reel of film.
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They had to send it to New York and have the technicians basically restore it.
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So it was definitely a if it can go wrong, it will go wrong type of production.
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my gosh.
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of
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can't remember who, I think I might've deleted the fun fact, but one of the later directors of the sequels contacted Spielberg for advice.
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And because everything had gone so wrong on Jaws, he just said, call someone you love every single day you're out there.
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Oh my god.
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m
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Which sounds like a man who's been through some shit, so.
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Yeah.
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Gosh.
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Speaking of the mechanical shark, his name was Bruce, named after Steven Spielberg's lawyer, so kind of tongue in cheek.
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But he doesn't appear for the first time until one hour, 21 minutes and 10 seconds into the movie.
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Also, he weighed more than a ton.
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So to have to wrangle a more than 2 pound shark that was not performing appropriately.
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That just doesn't sound like fun to me.
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No, not at all.
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And honestly, lot of, from what I read, that wasn't necessarily the original plan, but because the shark was malfunctioning so much, Spielberg kind of just had to roll with it.
00:16:05
And that's when he added in that speech from Quint about his time.
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on the USS Indianapolis.
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Yes, thank you.
00:16:13
He added in that because they needed more dialogue because the shark just wasn't working so they couldn't get as many shark shots as they wanted.
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cakes.
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That's a pretty iconic scene though.
00:16:23
Yeah, I like that one.
00:16:25
Another production concern they had was how to film a boat rocking from a boat rocking.
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And the cameraman for those scenes, Michael Chapman, literally just taught himself how to
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overcome how to counter the boats rocking.
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So any steady shots that you see of a boat rocking is literally him moving with the waves because there was no steady cam invented at that point.
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Yeah.
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crazy.
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Kind of along the lines of production.
00:17:03
Spielberg said that when they first tested it for audiences, the scene where the shark jumps out behind Brody, everybody just lost their minds.
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Like that was so scary.
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And he got greedy.
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So he added in the scene earlier where their underwater in the face pops out from the boat.
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And he said he kind of regretted it because afterwards people were on edge after that scene.
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So yeah, people screamed at that.
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But then when the shark pops out behind Brody, they didn't as much because they were expecting something.
00:17:35
So I think that's kind of fun that in such an iconic film, he was still learning stuff about how to make a horror movie.
00:17:43
Yeah.
00:17:44
I mean, he hadn't directed a horror movie prior to this, had he?
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I don't think he directed much of a movie at all.
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I know he'd done a lot of shorts and I think some like TV spots.
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But yeah, this was his fourth feature film, I believe.
00:18:06
And yeah, it doesn't look like the ones before it were horror movies.
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Just a little guy.
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28.
00:18:16
That's insane.
00:18:18
We talk pretty often about you got to get royalties on your films.
00:18:24
And Robert Shaw tried.
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He tried to get royalties instead of a paycheck.
00:18:28
He didn't want he didn't want both.
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He just wanted royalties.
00:18:31
And the producers told him no, and he ended up only making pennies compared to what he would have made.
00:18:38
Was he?
00:18:38
Okay, here's the thing.
00:18:39
I get them all confused because they all have our names and I don't think that's fair.
00:18:44
But all three main actors have our name.
00:18:48
Yeah, and that's not fair to me personally.
00:18:50
Who was it that was indebted to the IRS so they basically made nothing off of this?
00:18:57
Let me look it up.
00:18:58
It was Robert Shaw.
00:19:01
Yeah, so he was basically the only reason he took the job was because he had done tax evasion and the IRS was coming after him.
00:19:12
So he needed the money to pay them off.
00:19:15
And then everything he made, he basically paid to the IRS and didn't really see much from this at all.
00:19:22
Oh no.
00:19:23
Unfortunately, we do have to pay taxes.
00:19:27
Well, we do.
00:19:28
Not everybody.
00:19:29
yeah.
00:19:30
Not everybody has to.
00:19:32
But I have to.
00:19:34
Yeah.
00:19:35
And apparently Robert Shaw had to.
00:19:37
Yeah.
00:19:39
Damn, imagine the taxes he could have paid off if he got royalties on this movie.
00:19:43
Rolling in the dough.
00:19:44
You'd never have to pay taxes again because you just pay off the IRS every year
00:19:48
Yeah.
00:19:51
Ah funny.
00:19:52
Well, should we move on to JAWS 2, perhaps?
00:19:57
Yes, but I have a fun fact that's a good segue for that.
00:20:01
Okay.
00:20:02
The fun fact that will kick us off into these sequels is that Spielberg deeply regrets not taking control of the franchise the way that he did with Jurassic Park and Indiana Jones.
00:20:12
um He said that he wished that he was able to have some quality control over the sequels as he has with other franchises.
00:20:25
Yeah.
00:20:27
So with that being said, let's jump into them.
00:20:33
Alright, Jaws 2.
00:20:35
little overview.
00:20:38
Years after the shark attacks that left Amity Island reeling, Sheriff Martin Brody finds new trouble lurking in the waters.
00:20:44
Mayor Vaughn wants to rid the beach town of the stain on its reputation, but the disappearance of a pair of divers suggests that all is not right.
00:20:51
When Sheriff Brody voices his warnings about holding a sailing competition, everyone thinks it's PTS.
00:20:57
That is until a shark fin cuts through the water.
00:21:01
It was directed by, yeah, truly, directed by Geno Swaugh.
00:21:06
It was written by Carl Gottlieb and Howard Sackler, stars Brey Schneider, Lorraine Gray, and Murray Hamilton, obviously still based on that original story by Benchley.
00:21:18
It had a budget of about 20 million and it made around 208 million at the box office.
00:21:24
It currently has a 5.8 out of 10 on IMDB, a 58 % critic score.
00:21:29
and a 40 % audience score on Rotten Tomatoes.
00:21:33
It's not terrible.
00:21:35
No, it's a film.
00:21:38
Yeah.
00:21:40
Just to continue the segue, Spielberg also said that making a sequel to anything is just a cheap carny trick, his words.
00:21:53
So he declined signing on for any of the sequels and also felt that he had made the definitive shark movie, which
00:22:03
Fine.
00:22:04
Little pompous, but yeah, at least you're right.
00:22:08
He wasn't wrong, he did kind of make the definitive shark movie.
00:22:13
Yeah, none of them have been as good since.
00:22:15
Well, I...
00:22:16
Okay.
00:22:17
Anyway, um I don't want to give away too much, but.
00:22:21
Yeah, not as well made Jaws.
00:22:28
And...
00:22:29
Yeah, I feel like every other shark movie, including the sequel, is just kind of reheating Jaws' nachos, you know?
00:22:37
They got it right the first time.
00:22:39
And honestly, the same can be said about Jurassic Park.
00:22:43
I hate to say it.
00:22:44
The same can be said about Jurassic Park.
00:22:46
And what are they on?
00:22:48
Like the ninth or tenth one now?
00:22:50
Who's to say?
00:22:51
There's literally no way for us to know what Jurassic Park they're on right now.
00:22:55
Yeah, honestly.
00:22:58
because I refuse to Google it.
00:22:59
Anyways!
00:23:00
think they're on seven.
00:23:01
I think this is seven.
00:23:03
Incredible.
00:23:04
Anyway, he changed his tune when all the money from Jurassic Park started rolling in.
00:23:10
clearly.
00:23:11
Yeah.
00:23:12
because he still has a hand in those.
00:23:14
Yeah, he said, sequels are a sham.
00:23:16
And then he got on his hands and knees and begged Michael Crickton for a sequel.
00:23:21
Yeah, he really did.
00:23:22
We literally just read the books and learned that about the sequels.
00:23:25
He asked Michael Crichton.
00:23:29
I think it's Crichton.
00:23:30
Okay, I've never heard it said out loud.
00:23:32
to please, the only reason I've heard it said out loud is because I listened to the book instead of reading it.
00:23:37
But yeah, he specifically asked, please write a sequel.
00:23:43
And that's why it felt rushed.
00:23:44
need a sequel idea.
00:23:45
and then he didn't even use 90 % of what's in the book anyway.
00:23:50
So did you really need it, Mr.
00:23:53
Spielberg, sir?
00:23:55
And they're still using stuff from the original book in the newest movies.
00:24:01
But we're talking about sharks, not dinosaurs, which are...
00:24:06
also dinosaurs.
00:24:08
box office sensation that Roy Schneider desperately did not want to do.
00:24:15
Yeah.
00:24:16
Oh yeah, he didn't know when I do it.
00:24:18
He didn't want to do it.
00:24:19
I feel like it showed in every moment of his performance that that man had no interest in being there.
00:24:27
No, he did fine.
00:24:28
But that's not as dramatic.
00:24:32
But no, yeah, he was very dramatic.
00:24:35
He got in a physical altercation with the director, Szwarc when they basically didn't get along.
00:24:42
And one of the producers sat them down and...
00:24:45
said we need to work this out and they started fighting because they're children, I guess.
00:24:52
Yeah, there you go.
00:24:53
Ooh, that's a whole episode right there.
00:24:55
Should we get into it?
00:24:56
No.
00:24:58
I'm kidding.
00:24:58
We'll leave that for everybody on TikTok.
00:25:00
Anyways, Roy Schneider didn't want to be there in the first place.
00:25:05
He was kind of resentful from the onset, which is probably why they got into a bunch of fights, but he had...
00:25:12
a contract with Universal Pictures and he had backed out of the Deer Hunter, which was part of that contract.
00:25:19
And so basically the studio said, okay, you didn't want to do that.
00:25:24
Do Jaws 2 and we'll forgive the last two movies that are on your contract.
00:25:28
So it was basically a two for one deal, which is why he agreed to do it.
00:25:33
And he got paid like three or four times more.
00:25:36
He only got paid $100 for the first one and he got $400 for Jaws 2.
00:25:43
Well, to be fair, $100 in 1975 is like $8 million today, Something like that.
00:25:52
It's a lot.
00:25:53
It's not that much.
00:25:54
Yeah, it's much more, but...
00:25:56
Did you read also that he like through an actual fit?
00:26:01
He he caused a scene at the Beverly Hills Hotel and pleaded insanity in an attempt to get out of the movie.
00:26:10
Yeah.
00:26:11
What a drama queen.
00:26:13
Seriously.
00:26:14
Yeah, there's lots of reports that claim he was not a pleasure to work with on this film in particular.
00:26:19
Yeah.
00:26:21
In good news for this movie, the tagline did become one of the most famous taglines of all time.
00:26:26
It's parodied, it's referenced all the time now.
00:26:30
It was just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water.
00:26:34
Dot.
00:26:35
iconic.
00:26:36
Iconic.
00:26:38
Yeah, this whole franchise is nothing if not iconic.
00:26:43
Each for its own reasons.
00:26:46
Mm-hmm.
00:26:47
That would have been a really good segue to Jaws 3D.
00:26:50
But we're not done talking about Jaws 2.
00:26:55
Super cute little callback to the original.
00:26:57
There's a flower planter painted bright yellow on the Brody's front porch.
00:27:03
It's supposed to be a barrel from the first movie.
00:27:07
Yeah, I like that.
00:27:08
Cute little nod.
00:27:09
Yeah.
00:27:10
also from the original movie, the original sharks, the bruises were which I feel like we didn't talk about them as much as I had intended to.
00:27:24
There were three of them.
00:27:26
Yeah.
00:27:27
Why didn't I talk about them?
00:27:30
Maybe it was on a different film.
00:27:34
no, it was in this movie.
00:27:35
It was in this movie.
00:27:37
okay.
00:27:38
All of the real shark footage was recycled from the first film.
00:27:42
The original sharks from the first film, created sharks, the animatronic sharks, were rotten on the universe a lot.
00:27:51
So they had to create new ones.
00:27:53
They created three for different purposes, and their names were Bruce Two, Fidel, and Harold.
00:28:01
Very cute.
00:28:02
Yeah, I like that they have names like, yeah, we're gonna use Harold for this shot.
00:28:09
Yeah, that's nice.
00:28:11
I think the fandom, or maybe it stemmed from the novelizations, but they have in-universe names too.
00:28:19
Oh.
00:28:20
Yeah, it's Bruce in the first and then Brousset in the second.
00:28:24
It's his wife, apparently.
00:28:26
And then Broussetta and Baby in the third.
00:28:33
And then Vengeance is the fourth.
00:28:38
my god Vengeance, what is this fucking Batman?
00:28:45
No, it's Brustetta's brother, because Brustetta is Bruce and Brustette's daughter.
00:28:50
Vengeance is the brother and the son.
00:28:54
These are all Batman names.
00:28:56
Bruce is a Batman name.
00:28:58
It is, yeah.
00:29:00
Anyways, I think that's a fun fact.
00:29:02
That is a fun fact.
00:29:03
I like that a lot.
00:29:05
You know, my favorite fun fact maybe of any of the movies is that a camera operator had to use a horse saddle, a cowboy saddle to sit atop one of the animatronic sharks in a few of
00:29:20
the scenes.
00:29:20
That is so funny to me.
00:29:21
I wish there were pictures of that.
00:29:23
That would have been iconic behind the scenes shots,
00:29:27
Yeah, so fun.
00:29:29
Mm-hmm.
00:29:31
Mark Gilpin, plays Sean Brody, the younger brother.
00:29:35
He claimed that when they were shooting one of the scenes on one of the makeshift rafts of the like wrecked yachts, they were being circled by a real hammerhead shark.
00:29:47
And that they were all terrified, they started screaming to the production crew who is on a different like little dock, I guess.
00:29:55
And the crew
00:29:57
just thought that they were acting, so they were like, yeah, good job.
00:30:00
doing great.
00:30:02
Didn't come for them at all.
00:30:06
But clearly they all lived because sharks are not that dangerous.
00:30:10
Do you know another thing I learned today in my research?
00:30:15
The most often depicted shark species in media.
00:30:22
Is it not Great Whites?
00:30:23
It is not Great White.
00:30:25
Wow!
00:30:27
That's number two.
00:30:28
Is it tiger sharks?
00:30:31
Hammerhead.
00:30:31
Nice.
00:30:34
One of the top three, think, must have been the third or maybe it was the top five I had never heard of.
00:30:42
was like a sea beagle or something.
00:30:44
It's called a poor beagle.
00:30:48
Poor beagle shark.
00:30:49
never, genuinely never heard of that.
00:30:51
And that was like the number three or number four most often portrayed shark in the media.
00:30:58
Interesting.
00:31:00
I pride myself on my knowledge of sharks and I never heard of that one.
00:31:04
So interesting.
00:31:06
We all learn new things.
00:31:08
Sometimes.
00:31:10
occasionally.
00:31:11
Yeah, if you're open to it.
00:31:13
Knowledge is everywhere.
00:31:14
Yeah.
00:31:17
One of my favorite fun facts from this one was that they were experiencing problems finding a director.
00:31:25
Had a lot of issues there before they settled on, not settled on Szwarc but before he took the role.
00:31:31
And at that time, Steven Soderbergh, director, was 14 years old and he wrote a letter to Universal Studios pleading them to direct the movie.
00:31:45
Oh
00:31:47
Yeah, very cute.
00:31:48
One of the Universal producers, Richard Zanuck, he read the letter at the time, thought it was great, and then decades later, letter, letter, met Soderbergh after Soderbergh had
00:32:02
become a notable filmmaker and basically was like, that was a great letter and if I knew how Jaws 2 was gonna go I probably would have taken you up on that.
00:32:14
that's great.
00:32:15
Yeah, I thought that was very fun.
00:32:17
Especially since I didn't meet Steven Soderbergh, but I was in the same room as him because he showed up for a Q &A for Presence that I was at, which came out this year.
00:32:29
Also highly recommend, it was a great movie.
00:32:31
So it was cool to see him talk about the behind the scenes.
00:32:35
to segue into a completely different norm of being, but.
00:32:38
Yeah, as we so often do.
00:32:41
Yeah.
00:32:42
This movie could have been a lot darker.
00:32:45
It was going to be much darker with the original director that they had hired on, who also took a long time to find.
00:32:53
But Universal and MCA executives wanted it to be more lighthearted.
00:32:57
uh And they told that director a month into filming that they wanted this and then shortly after he was fired and replaced.
00:33:09
That's showbiz.
00:33:11
I guess so.
00:33:13
Do have any good segue fun facts?
00:33:17
into Jaws 3D?
00:33:20
Well, it is also a movie about a killer shark.
00:33:24
Whoa, no way!
00:33:26
That feels like a good enough segue for me.
00:33:28
Works for me too, let's go!
00:33:31
Jaws 3D came out in 1983 and was directed by Joe Alves, who worked on the prior two films.
00:33:36
It stars Dennis Quaid now as Michael Brody, Bess Armstrong, John Putch, and Louis Gossett Jr.
00:33:43
After a young great white shark finds its way into a sea-themed park, workers try to capture it, but the facility's attempt to keep the shark in captivity has dire
00:33:52
consequences.
00:33:53
A much larger mother shark appears in search of its offspring.
00:33:56
Among those who must battle the angry aquatic killing machine are marine biologist Katherine Morgan, her coworker Mike Brody, and a pair of friendly dolphins.
00:34:04
That's from Google.
00:34:06
This Jaws had an $18 million budget and grossed $87 million at the World Wide Box office.
00:34:11
Despite being the most talked about in terms of how bad it is, it's not the worst rated.
00:34:16
It has a 3.7 out of 10 on IMDb, a 1.7 out of 5 on Letterboxd,
00:34:21
and a whopping 17 % audience and 11 % critic score on Rotten Tomatoes.
00:34:28
I'm gonna be honest, about half of the fun facts for this movie that I found were just that Dennis Quaid was on Coke the entire time.
00:34:37
The whole time, coked up.
00:34:40
Every scene on cocaine.
00:34:43
Yeah, he admitted it several times that he's high the entire production.
00:34:49
Yeah.
00:34:50
And he's also also I didn't know this and I don't even know if you mentioned it to me if you did you probably did and I just forgot he's a little scream king.
00:34:59
Dennis Quaid?
00:35:02
What else is Ian?
00:35:04
That other movie, what is it?
00:35:06
You know, it's the space one, but they're actually underwater.
00:35:11
He's underwater in like a spaceship in both of his horror movies.
00:35:17
Yeah, oh my god, you're so right.
00:35:18
What was that called?
00:35:20
I know what you're talking about.
00:35:24
Yeah, he what do mean?
00:35:25
I had to tell you he was in it.
00:35:26
You watched it.
00:35:29
No, no, no, no, I don't think you mentioned that he's a scream king.
00:35:34
well, because I think it takes more than two to make you a screen king.
00:35:38
Well now he's in that show.
00:35:40
So now he is.
00:35:42
I also don't recognize MAGA as Scream King, so...
00:35:47
Yeah, he's...
00:35:48
Loves Trump.
00:35:50
Yeah, big Trump guy.
00:35:52
Pandorum!
00:35:53
It's Pandorum.
00:35:54
Pandorum, yeah, I like that movie.
00:35:57
I don't mind that movie.
00:35:59
Like I know overall, kind of bad, but I'm still gonna watch it.
00:36:03
Yeah.
00:36:05
Yeah.
00:36:05
Sometimes you like bad movies and that's okay.
00:36:08
Honestly, we talk a lot about good bad movies and Jaws 3D is absolutely one of them.
00:36:15
Thank you for segwaying, segwaying so I didn't have to.
00:36:19
We're gonna talk about...
00:36:21
The greatest of bad movies.
00:36:24
This is one of them.
00:36:25
Gotta be up there.
00:36:26
It's up there.
00:36:28
This is- it's just...
00:36:30
It's an experience to watch it.
00:36:32
It's certainly a product of its time.
00:36:35
3D was not...
00:36:38
What it is- it's still not good today.
00:36:41
It was really not good in the 80s.
00:36:43
Yeah, and originally they did plan to have very few of those pop out moments, but the executives kind of pressured them to include more because they didn't want people to go to
00:36:55
a 3D movie and be like, that could have been 2D, you know?
00:36:59
I wonder if they felt that way regardless because I certainly did.
00:37:05
what I wouldn't give to see this movie in 3D the way it was intended because I've only ever seen it 2D.
00:37:12
So here's the thing though, I think it still is in 3D.
00:37:18
That's the 3D.
00:37:20
I think so.
00:37:21
I don't think so.
00:37:23
No, I refuse to believe that's how it's supposed to look,
00:37:28
Yeah, I don't know that there was any sort of special viewing apparatus.
00:37:36
They had to have the glasses.
00:37:38
Cinema audiences could wear disposable cardboard polarized 3D glasses to create the illusion.
00:37:43
I was like, there's no way that was what it was.
00:37:47
So yes, they did have the glasses and I would kill to have those and to see it in the 3D experience.
00:37:54
Maybe one day they'll re-release it.
00:37:56
Yeah.
00:37:58
Yeah.
00:37:58
It's the 50th anniversary.
00:38:00
There's really no time like the present.
00:38:02
Truly.
00:38:04
This movie is really like a standalone movie.
00:38:10
It's canonically not the third movie in the series.
00:38:15
It's separate.
00:38:17
According to Universal, this is...
00:38:19
Yes, well at the time of release it was, and then they retconned that later.
00:38:24
Yes, they were like, that sucked.
00:38:26
Forget it ever happened.
00:38:28
This is a trilogy and the and the revenge is the last installment.
00:38:33
They said it did so poorly.
00:38:35
We're just going to pretend it didn't happen and we're going to release the fourth one as the third one.
00:38:39
And then that did not go well either.
00:38:41
However, we'll get there.
00:38:45
Originally this was pitched as a spoof, which I feel like might've shown all the...
00:38:53
I feel like you can...
00:38:54
there's remnants of that.
00:38:56
But maybe that's just because I'm watching a 3D movie from 1983 with a 20-25 lens, you know?
00:39:04
That could also be contributing to that.
00:39:06
Yeah.
00:39:07
But yeah, I think they wanted to title it National Lampoon's Jaws 3 People Zero.
00:39:14
which is such an incredible title.
00:39:19
And it opened with the author Peter Benchley being eaten in his pool by a shark.
00:39:26
Oh my god.
00:39:28
Wait, that sounds like the opening scene of a scary movie.
00:39:33
It does, yeah.
00:39:35
It sounds like what night swim should have been.
00:39:38
Oh yeah, that would have been way better than what we got at a night swim.
00:39:41
love to see National Lampoon's Jaws 3 people zero.
00:39:46
But it didn't work out.
00:39:47
Spielberg rejected the idea.
00:39:48
He threatened to walk from his deal with Universal if they did it, and so they didn't do it.
00:39:55
And Zanuck and Brown, the two producers, when they heard that Spielberg had rejected it, they quit the studio altogether.
00:40:03
Honestly, this might as well be universal could have made because had they lost Spielberg, they wouldn't have gotten E.T., Jurassic Park.
00:40:11
Those all came out after.
00:40:13
When did ET come out?
00:40:16
after.
00:40:17
Maybe not.
00:40:18
After 1983, I don't know.
00:40:21
I know Jurassic Park did.
00:40:24
ET was 1982.
00:40:26
So one year behind, yeah.
00:40:28
But yeah, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, The Color Purple, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Hook, Jurassic Park, Schindler's List all came out after.
00:40:38
Indiana Jones was Paramount, though, not Universal.
00:40:42
Oh.
00:40:44
So they would have lost Jurassic Park Schindler's List.
00:40:48
and Munich.
00:40:50
Dude, Munich has one of the most fucking amazing soundtracks.
00:40:54
Like, unironically, it's literally John Williams' best work.
00:40:58
I believe you.
00:40:59
Thank you.
00:41:01
Anyways, back to Jaws 3D.
00:41:03
Yes.
00:41:04
Also, not a coincidence that this movie tanked and John Williams didn't have a hand in it.
00:41:08
Just saying, this one and the fourth one, John Williams didn't have a hand in and they were terrible.
00:41:13
That can't be a coincidence.
00:41:15
Well, the second one didn't get great reviews either, so...
00:41:18
But it wasn't a flop.
00:41:22
It still made $200 million.
00:41:24
People still saw it.
00:41:26
Jaws 3D still made money too, that's why they made a fourth.
00:41:29
Barely!
00:41:31
Anyway, should we talk about all the animals that are in this movie?
00:41:33
Because I want to talk about them.
00:41:35
Okay, so Capricorn the dolphin is one of the two dolps.
00:41:39
I'm gonna I'm just gonna rapid fire a bunch of facts.
00:41:42
One of the dolphins, Capricorn, still alive in Discovery Cove in Orlando.
00:41:47
He's almost 60 years old at this point.
00:41:50
Okay, but do we know that for sure?
00:41:51
Because the most recent account I could find was from 2022.
00:41:55
everywhere that would have been updated with his death has not been updated with his death.
00:42:02
So I'm fairly confident he's still alive.
00:42:05
alive?
00:42:05
Alright.
00:42:07
Good.
00:42:08
But that's like getting there, right?
00:42:11
Yeah, was like, that's old for an elephant.
00:42:15
Yeah.
00:42:16
in captivity, definitely.
00:42:18
That's old.
00:42:20
Um, Kotar is the orca featured in the movie, and I recognized him immediately.
00:42:27
Him and Sumar have that same, like, they have like a flat flop fin, where you know, like, Keiko has like the round, they have a flat, like a flop, but just like, puh.
00:42:36
Anyway.
00:42:36
Kotar is an Icelandic whale like Kago from Free Willy, so they could have been related.
00:42:43
He's lived at every Sea World park.
00:42:46
That's another fun fact about him.
00:42:47
But my favorite fun fact about him is that he is notorious for having bitten the penis off of another whale.
00:42:54
That's pretty cool.
00:42:55
Yeah.
00:42:55
And then he died because he was playing with a gate and the gate closed on his head.
00:42:59
I know very sad.
00:43:01
Yeah, that's why we don't keep large cetaceans or any cetaceans in captivity.
00:43:08
Yeah, very sad.
00:43:10
But Kotar, I mean not Kotar, Capricorn, still living the life, I guess.
00:43:16
Nice.
00:43:18
Also, one more, sorry, one more.
00:43:21
Cindy and Sandy, the dolphins, were nominated for a Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Actor, which is so rude.
00:43:32
I feel like they did great.
00:43:34
think it's kind of funny.
00:43:38
Yeah, there are animals, they did fine.
00:43:40
But I think it's kind of funny to be like, that dolphin sucked at acting.
00:43:45
I'm gonna nominate it for an award that means you sucked.
00:43:50
This is also the first sequel of Jaws to be nominated for the Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Picture.
00:43:57
I think it might be the first sequel, period.
00:44:00
Yeah, I think you're right.
00:44:02
The first sequel.
00:44:03
Yeah, usually it's OGs only, but this changed that they said, no, no, you're special.
00:44:11
This is also the first Jaws film to feature multiple sharks.
00:44:15
The only.
00:44:16
Yeah, the only right the only of the four
00:44:20
and the Brody brothers, only two characters should be in all four films.
00:44:25
And they're played by different actors every film.
00:44:28
Yeah, no one wants to come back as the Brody Brothers.
00:44:32
What are going to do?
00:44:33
They were so cruel to Sam, the entire franchise.
00:44:38
Not Sam, Sean.
00:44:41
It looks the same.
00:44:42
It looks the same.
00:44:44
Sean, yeah, they really just let that kid have it.
00:44:49
Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?
00:44:52
In one of the remade shots when the shark explodes at the end, some of the entrails that fly out of the screen in 3D are actually a brown leather ET doll.
00:45:06
Cute.
00:45:07
I like that.
00:45:09
fun little nod to Spielberg.
00:45:12
And you know what's crazy is I knew that fun fact and still wondered if ET had gone already.
00:45:17
know what's crazy is me too.
00:45:20
you uh
00:45:22
Now what a twist of events if we found out ET came out after.
00:45:27
right?
00:45:30
In this movie's defense, it was the highest grossing 3D film all the way up until 2003 when Spy Kids 3 Game Over came out.
00:45:44
Which totally reasonable.
00:45:45
That movie slapped.
00:45:47
my god, yeah.
00:45:50
Your 30 year reign is over.
00:45:54
You know what, for me, Zoroids are a really hard race between the two of them, of which one I like better.
00:46:00
But Spy Kids 3 deserved it, you know?
00:46:04
Yeah, see, I don't remember Spy Kids 3.
00:46:07
I will never forget Jaws 3D.
00:46:10
I couldn't forget Spy Kids 3D if I tried.
00:46:14
Where they go into the game and there's the guy who's just Elijah Wood.
00:46:20
Elijah Woods in it?
00:46:22
Yeah, for like five seconds.
00:46:25
It's a great film.
00:46:26
Highly recommend.
00:46:28
Highly recommend doing a double feature of Jaws 3D and then Spy Kids 3.
00:46:34
Yeah.
00:46:35
Tune in for episode 126 of the Horror Cuties podcast.
00:46:41
The Killer Cuties podcast.
00:46:42
It's been 125 episodes.
00:46:44
I still can't get it right.
00:46:46
Where we talk about Spy Kids 3, game over.
00:46:48
Yeah, we are gonna do that.
00:46:51
I give you little hints for guess the plot, but.
00:46:54
Hahaha
00:46:55
We've been yapping for an hour and we still got a whole nother movie to talk about and that's my segue for Jaws the Revenge.
00:47:01
Great, love it.
00:47:03
That's all we need.
00:47:04
Okay, Jaws Revenge, the fourth and final movie in the franchise.
00:47:10
Again, this movie retcons everything that happened in 3D.
00:47:13
They pretend that that does not exist.
00:47:16
In this one, the family of widow Ellen Brody has long been plagued by shark attacks.
00:47:21
And this unfortunate association continues when her son, Sean, is the victim of a massive great white.
00:47:28
In mourning, Ellen goes to visit her other son, Michael,
00:47:31
in the Bahamas where she meets the charming Hoagie.
00:47:34
As Ellen and Hoagie begin a relationship, a huge shark appears off the coast of the island that followed them there, to be clear.
00:47:42
And Ellen's trouble with great whites begins again.
00:47:45
This was directed by Joseph Sargent.
00:47:47
It was written by Michael de Guzman, again based on the original story.
00:47:52
It stars Lorraine Gray, Lance Gast, and Michael Caine as Hoagie.
00:47:56
It had a budget of 23 million and made about 51.9 million at the box office.
00:48:01
It currently has a 3.1 out of 10 on IMDb, a 15 % audience score, and a whopping 2 % critic score on Rotten Tomatoes, which I think is now our record for the lowest Rotten Tomatoes
00:48:20
score of a movie we have talked about on this podcast.
00:48:24
Yeah.
00:48:25
That's crazy.
00:48:26
2 % is...
00:48:28
that's wild.
00:48:29
Also sorry, I said Lorraine Grey.
00:48:32
Her name is Lorraine Gary.
00:48:33
My bad.
00:48:35
Yeah.
00:48:37
Well, Jaws 4.
00:48:38
um Again, this is canonically the third film because 3D did so poorly, Universal was like, this is the final installment of the Jaws trilogy.
00:48:50
Mm-hmm.
00:48:52
cute.
00:48:52
my canon.
00:48:57
Canon is just Jaws 3D and that's it.
00:49:00
uh
00:49:00
more Jaws movies.
00:49:01
That's all that they needed Yeah, honestly
00:49:05
No, I'm kidding.
00:49:08
Also, this this should have been when I said first Lorraine Carey came out of retirement to reprise her role of Ellen Brody.
00:49:16
And it's her final acting role still to this day.
00:49:18
She's still alive.
00:49:19
She hasn't acted since
00:49:21
Did you like this one?
00:49:23
film or as a silly goofy tie?
00:49:27
oh
00:49:27
either.
00:49:29
No, and a little bit?
00:49:34
Parts of it?
00:49:37
Yeah.
00:49:38
It would have been a lot stronger for me had they kept the original premise of
00:49:44
What the fuck is his name?
00:49:45
Not Michael Keaton.
00:49:47
What is his name?
00:49:47
Michael Caine.
00:49:49
Michael Caine.
00:49:50
He was supposed to be peddling drugs.
00:49:54
yeah, they were gonna bring in the mafia aspect that's in the book.
00:49:59
But they didn't do that.
00:50:00
That would have been fun.
00:50:01
they wanted to focus more on the sharks, which I get it, it's a Jaws movie, but that would have been fun.
00:50:08
It would've.
00:50:09
I think I don't go into the fourth one.
00:50:16
thinking it's going to be good.
00:50:18
Sure.
00:50:20
So there's parts of it that are just kind of bad.
00:50:23
And then there's parts of it that are so bad that they're kind of funny.
00:50:27
And that's the fourth Jaws.
00:50:29
That's it.
00:50:30
That's all there is to it.
00:50:32
Yeah.
00:50:34
My favorite fun fact though is that Michael Caine is in the Guinness Book of World Records under the category of most told anecdote for his story about this movie.
00:50:44
He's told it 174 times and the story is basically that he's never seen the movie but he has seen the house it paid for which is great.
00:50:53
He got paid like one and a half million dollars to be in this movie.
00:50:58
of work in Hawaii, I think is where they filmed.
00:51:01
Yep.
00:51:03
And I believe he got the script, read the words, fade in Hawaii, and said, I'll do it.
00:51:10
So.
00:51:11
I'm not even reading the script.
00:51:13
it's a $1.5 million bag, okay.
00:51:17
fade in Hawaii?
00:51:18
Yeah, I mean.
00:51:19
Even if it fade in the bottom of my husband's shoe, I don't fucking care where it's filmed.
00:51:28
100, 1.5 million, I'm doing it.
00:51:31
Even in today's money.
00:51:32
He did say, won an Oscar, built a house and had a great holiday.
00:51:37
Not bad for a flop movie.
00:51:41
Which is true.
00:51:41
He did win the Oscar that year for Hannah and her sisters.
00:51:45
He wasn't able to go to the ceremony because they couldn't spare him from filming this.
00:51:52
And he is the second actor to follow up.
00:51:56
an Academy Award win with a Razzie Award nominated performance.
00:52:02
in a Jaws movie.
00:52:03
in a Jaws movie.
00:52:05
The first was Louise Gossett Jr.
00:52:07
who won for An Officer and A Gentleman and then was nominated for Jaws 3D.
00:52:13
The Razzie's love Jaws.
00:52:15
I get it.
00:52:17
sad.
00:52:17
This is sad.
00:52:19
Quickly.
00:52:20
Sad.
00:52:21
Judith Barsi.
00:52:23
She's probably most famously most famous from her role in Lay Before Time.
00:52:27
She played Ducky.
00:52:29
She was murdered shortly after this movie was released and Lance Guest, played her dad, who played Mike Brody in Jaws, The Revenge, was one of her pallbearers at her funeral.
00:52:42
very tragic.
00:52:43
It's incredible and just an absolutely incredible failure of the child protection system.
00:52:48
But.
00:52:52
She had just so much ahead of her.
00:52:55
felt like it was.
00:52:57
relevant to mention that, you know.
00:53:00
Anyway.
00:53:02
Anyway.
00:53:02
It's very sad.
00:53:04
Yeah, it's always tough, because we don't want to ignore it.
00:53:07
She was a great talent, and it's a tragedy what happened.
00:53:10
But we acknowledge, and then we can talk about other stuff, too.
00:53:17
Yeah.
00:53:19
Like how the shark roaring during the climax of the film was ripped from an episode of Tom and Jerry.
00:53:23
It sure was.
00:53:25
Tell them why, Katie.
00:53:27
Because the sound I didn't write this down, but I think I remember the sound engineer said it was absolutely ridiculous that a shark would roar and refuse to make a shark roaring
00:53:38
sound.
00:53:39
So he stole one.
00:53:40
Pretty much, the sound editor just refused to make one.
00:53:42
They were like, that's really stupid, we're not doing that.
00:53:45
And it is really stupid, but it's also one of my favorite parts of the movie, so.
00:53:54
my God.
00:53:56
Yeah.
00:53:57
Bruce the rubber shark, well, the one that they used for this one, which I guess they called Bruce again.
00:54:02
But anyways, it was nominated for a golden raspberry award for worst actor in this movie.
00:54:07
So he was the second quote unquote animal to be nominated for one since Cindy and Sandy for a 3D.
00:54:18
See, it's funnier to nominate the animatronic shark than it is to nominate the actual dolphins that really worked hard and did great performances.
00:54:27
I agree that it's funnier to nominate an animatronic, but I also like, the dolphins don't know Katie, they're fine.
00:54:36
Poor Capricorn.
00:54:38
Yeah.
00:54:39
So according to the director sergeant on this film, he basically said that they went through so many story pitches that just kept getting rejected.
00:54:48
And finally they submitted this one that they all thought was this preposterous idea that the shark actually comes out and seeks revenge on the Brody family because they were just
00:54:59
so burnt out creatively that that was what they were left with.
00:55:02
And Universal was like, yeah, that works.
00:55:04
Let's do it.
00:55:05
And they just went along with it because they were like, we don't have any other ideas, so sure.
00:55:10
So I think they knew they were cooked from the beginning.
00:55:12
And also, I think it's a fair sign that Dennis Quaid, Bess Armstrong, Murray Hamilton, and Roy Schneider all were offered parts and all said, absolutely not, we're not doing that.
00:55:24
Roy Schneider said, Scheider, Schneider?
00:55:28
Scheider?
00:55:29
I've been reading that as Schneider quite literally.
00:55:34
since the first time I ever saw Jaws.
00:55:36
That's crazy.
00:55:37
I'm so sorry, Mr.
00:55:38
Scheider.
00:55:39
uh When he declined, he said Satan himself could not get me to do Jaws part four, so.
00:55:47
Yeah.
00:55:48
Literally the only person besides Lorraine Gary that said that they would reprise their role was Murray Hamilton, who died of cancer before they could start filming.
00:55:59
That's true.
00:55:59
I did misspeak.
00:56:00
He did not reject it.
00:56:01
He just couldn't do it because he was offered it.
00:56:04
And he passed away first.
00:56:05
yeah,
00:56:07
some of the boat scenes and the actor close-ups at the end.
00:56:11
which you can tell because you can see the backdrop, they were filmed at Falls Lake at Universal City Studios in California.
00:56:17
We have walked by where they filmed that.
00:56:20
It's the big lake.
00:56:21
It's right over by the War of the Worlds plane crash now.
00:56:25
It's like right past that.
00:56:27
They filmed Sully there.
00:56:28
They filmed a lot of shit there.
00:56:29
But yeah, we've been there.
00:56:31
It's also near the Psycho House.
00:56:34
Yeah.
00:56:35
If you go to Universal Studios, you can walk by.
00:56:39
Wear that shark roared.
00:56:41
Yeah.
00:56:44
No.
00:56:45
It was...
00:56:48
Yes, that scene was actually crucial to the film itself.
00:56:51
yeah.
00:56:52
God, okay, well, we're gonna do things a little bit differently.
00:56:56
We're going to first rank critically the four Jaws films.
00:57:04
You can go first, rank critically the four Jaws films.
00:57:10
Yeah, it's uh in order of release.
00:57:12
they literally just progressively get worse.
00:57:15
critically, Jaws, Jaws 2, Jaws 3D, Jaws the Revenge.
00:57:20
What about you?
00:57:20
there you go.
00:57:22
hot take.
00:57:24
Very hot if you disagree.
00:57:26
I think that that's almost an objective ranking that I just did, so.
00:57:30
Yeah, I like Jaws 2 better than Jaws 1.
00:57:35
I think Jaws 2 is a better film than Jaws 1.
00:57:40
So I do Jaws 2, Jaws, Jaws 3D, Jaws Revenge.
00:57:45
I'm probably the only person that thinks that, but but literally.
00:57:49
To be clear, you are the only person who thinks that.
00:57:52
That's maybe your wildest take I've ever heard.
00:57:56
It's just the story stands on its own two feet.
00:58:01
John Williams is better.
00:58:04
I mean, Josh is too, but it's a sequel that says something.
00:58:07
John Williams is more John Williams-y, which is great.
00:58:11
The acting and cast are great.
00:58:14
I just, I like it better.
00:58:17
And now we're going to rate it.
00:58:20
Okay.
00:58:21
Okay, Jaws, how scary do think it was?
00:58:23
Yep.
00:58:25
Well, no, I give it a one.
00:58:27
Okay.
00:58:29
For why?
00:58:30
I think any amount of open water in the dark is a little, it's disconcerting perhaps, a little unsettling.
00:58:39
em So I gave a 0.5 to all of the films with the exception of 3D because it was too kooky.
00:58:50
and also not in really deep water.
00:58:53
Do we want to just do all of them then?
00:58:54
You just gave your scores for all of them.
00:58:59
Oh, okay.
00:59:01
Yeah.
00:59:02
behind my scores for all of them, not just this one.
00:59:06
Yeah.
00:59:07
How sexy did I, you, yeah, sorry.
00:59:13
Do you want to do it again?
00:59:14
Yeah, how sexy did you think it was?
00:59:17
I gave it a three out of five.
00:59:19
Wow, okay.
00:59:21
Yeah, this has a 70s sex appeal about it.
00:59:26
I've got a thing for boat slash fish guys.
00:59:29
I married one, in fact.
00:59:31
I think my type is just ocean.
00:59:33
Mm-hmm.
00:59:34
Yeah, that checks out.
00:59:35
Yeah, but then add the 70s vibes and the sharks and the beach.
00:59:40
3.5.
00:59:41
Oh, 3.5 or 3?
00:59:42
So 3.5 out of 5.
00:59:43
Sorry.
00:59:44
Wow.
00:59:46
3.5.
00:59:47
It's a sexy movie.
00:59:48
It's fun.
00:59:50
Swimsuits and...
00:59:53
What did you give it?
00:59:56
Oh.
00:59:56
Yeah, half a point just for the summer beach 70s vibe.
01:00:00
um I don't think fishermen are sexy.
01:00:04
Sorry.
01:00:04
I don't.
01:00:06
I think Killing Sharks is sexy.
01:00:09
I don't think most of it is sexy except for the slight summer vibe.
01:00:17
Yeah.
01:00:19
I mean, to be clear, I don't like the killing of fish.
01:00:23
Any fish.
01:00:25
But like, fisherman vibes?
01:00:27
Yeah, you don't like it, you just think it's sexy.
01:00:30
correct.
01:00:33
And that's fine, we don't king shame.
01:00:36
No.
01:00:38
No, I'm kidding.
01:00:39
How fucked up did you think it was?
01:00:42
I gave it a one.
01:00:44
I gave it half a point just because I do think them killing little Timmy in the 70s was probably pretty fucked up.
01:00:51
Sure.
01:00:52
What do I do?
01:00:53
I gave it a 1 for the dog.
01:00:56
Oh, dogs die in every horror movie.
01:00:59
No, they don't.
01:01:00
Most of them.
01:01:01
They made a whole website about it.
01:01:03
Yeah, so you could check which ones they did.
01:01:05
If they all had it, you wouldn't need the website.
01:01:08
Well, because it happens so often they had to make it so you could check.
01:01:12
Overall, what did you think of Jaws?
01:01:16
I can see why it's a classic.
01:01:18
It's a wonderfully made film.
01:01:19
had great acting, an iconic score, but I can only give it a 3.5.
01:01:27
For the cultural impact and the subsequent villainization of sharks, this movie deserves to suffer for that reason and giving it a 3.5 out of 5 is how I'm doing my part.
01:01:34
I would have given it a 4.5 otherwise.
01:01:37
wow, okay.
01:01:39
Right you.
01:01:41
If I'm, okay, if I rate it critically, it's a five out of five.
01:01:47
I think that this is one of the best movies ever made.
01:01:51
If I'm rating it based on how much like I personally have fun watching it, it's a four.
01:01:57
Still very good.
01:01:59
Classic, great, love to watch it in the summer.
01:02:03
but not like an S tier for me, you know?
01:02:06
Yeah, yeah.
01:02:08
Yeah, okay.
01:02:09
Jaws 2?
01:02:11
How scary do think it was?
01:02:13
Point five.
01:02:14
Okay.
01:02:16
I gave it a one for the same reason.
01:02:18
Great, okay, how sexy did you think this one was?
01:02:21
It had a little bit less of the like warm, summery 70s vibe.
01:02:26
So I only gave it a two.
01:02:27
It's still beachy, still fishy, but just a two.
01:02:32
I agree that the vibe was not as sexy.
01:02:34
I gave it a .5.
01:02:36
Just didn't.
01:02:37
at all.
01:02:38
Not to me.
01:02:39
Okay.
01:02:41
How fucked up did you think it was?
01:02:44
Yeah.
01:02:46
It's the same shit I already saw in Jaws.
01:02:50
Yeah.
01:02:51
Overall, what'd think?
01:02:54
I wildly unpopular opinion, but I did like this one better and I already explained myself.
01:02:58
gave it a four.
01:03:00
Just a slight bump over the first one.
01:03:03
I really liked it.
01:03:04
I don't understand the hate.
01:03:06
It's good.
01:03:07
to like look at you right now.
01:03:09
That's, this is a, this is so unexpected.
01:03:14
I fell asleep during the first one, the second one I could not keep my eyes off of.
01:03:19
What did you give it?
01:03:20
Thank you for asking me.
01:03:24
I don't like this one.
01:03:25
I don't think it's very good and I don't think it's very fun at all.
01:03:30
I think this one, if I'm being honest, if I had to rewatch any of them, this is my last pick.
01:03:36
Wow.
01:03:38
Well.
01:03:39
give it the worst rating though because that's not fair.
01:03:45
But I gave it a two because I just I think it's so boring.
01:03:49
I don't know.
01:03:50
I just did not have a good time watching it and it kind of just faded into the background for me.
01:03:56
Like I can't even really think of anything memorable that happened in it.
01:03:59
Not the fact that the shark looked like the Phantom of the Opera or...
01:04:06
yeah.
01:04:09
Or the Free Willy of it all.
01:04:10
because the other three have such iconic, for better or worse, iconic moments in them that this one just kind of fades for me.
01:04:23
Okay, yeah, that's fair.
01:04:25
Yeah.
01:04:27
Alright, let's get to the real meat of this.
01:04:31
Jaws 3D, let's go.
01:04:33
Okay, how scary do you think it was?
01:04:36
I gave this an 0.52.
01:04:38
yeah, no, this one's not even trying.
01:04:42
How sexy did you think it was?
01:04:43
Okay, literally nothing on this planet is sexier than retro sea world.
01:04:53
I fucking love 80s, 90s sea world.
01:04:57
There's just nothing better.
01:04:59
It's everything to me.
01:05:01
The wetsuits, the short shorts, the stunt water skiing, the fish of it all.
01:05:07
Four out of five, my guy.
01:05:09
Wait, there's nothing sexier, but it's a four out of five?
01:05:13
There wasn't enough retro sea world.
01:05:16
That's the only thing that could have been...
01:05:17
Yeah.
01:05:20
Yeah.
01:05:21
Got it.
01:05:21
Okay, that checks out.
01:05:23
Yeah.
01:05:24
Yeah.
01:05:24
What did you give it?
01:05:26
I gave it a two.
01:05:28
I do think this is the sexiest of them.
01:05:32
The cast, the short shorts.
01:05:34
Dennis Quaid was unfortunately very handsome as a kid.
01:05:37
I think Maga made him ugly, but that's, know, that happens when you're ugly inside.
01:05:42
It comes outward.
01:05:44
So.
01:05:45
At least now we have Jack Quaid, who has adamantly gone against what his father likes.
01:05:52
good.
01:05:54
Love that for us.
01:05:55
Yeah, me too.
01:05:57
how fucked up did you think it was?
01:05:58
Okay.
01:06:00
Actually, no.
01:06:02
Thinking back, I am gonna give it half a point because I think the scene where Baby Shark dies is sad.
01:06:10
When they put him in the pool and she's like, so she's trying to get him to keep moving and he dies and the kid's screaming in the background.
01:06:18
Very sad.
01:06:19
This fucked up.
01:06:21
um I also gave it a one for dolphins in peril.
01:06:25
Don't laugh.
01:06:30
valid.
01:06:31
No, it was a supportive laugh.
01:06:34
uh was a camaraderie laugh.
01:06:37
Sure.
01:06:38
Sure.
01:06:39
Yeah.
01:06:41
We have a friend who we warn about children in peril in horror movies.
01:06:45
Like, you can't see this movie because there's children in peril.
01:06:48
I wish to...
01:06:50
Ren.
01:06:52
Oh, I was like, you're that friend, Katie.
01:06:54
I tell you when that's gonna happen.
01:06:56
Well, I would like to add to this list and have dolphins in peril be one of my triggers, because I didn't like that.
01:07:04
truly can't think of another horror movie we would ever watch that has dolphins in barrel, if I'm being honest.
01:07:09
So just, you know, that just solidifies my giving it half a point for that.
01:07:15
It's fucked up and unique.
01:07:19
Overall, what did you think of it?
01:07:21
I mean, I think critically, this is not as bad as people make it out to be.
01:07:27
It's another product of its time.
01:07:28
3D movies were not what they are today.
01:07:32
The effects are absolutely fucking trash.
01:07:35
But I can forgive that a little bit in the spirit of trying a new technology, because that's what they were doing.
01:07:40
The acting is not as strong.
01:07:42
The story was really not as strong, albeit a great setting.
01:07:46
So I gave this one a 2.5.
01:07:49
Yeah, I agree.
01:07:52
point five.
01:07:53
Yeah, I think if I was gonna rate it critically, it would be like a 1.5.
01:07:59
But if I'm basing it on my personal enjoyment...
01:08:03
2.5.
01:08:05
If I'm basing it on my personal enjoyment of the scene where the shark breaks the glass, five out of five.
01:08:13
I rewatched that on YouTube like nine times after I finished.
01:08:18
Yep.
01:08:18
ah Quite the film.
01:08:22
Yeah.
01:08:23
Alright, we're rounding it out with Jaws the Revenge.
01:08:28
How scary do think it was?
01:08:30
I gave it a one for the deep water thing.
01:08:32
Dark, dark deep water.
01:08:34
Deep water doesn't bother me.
01:08:35
Dark deep water is worse.
01:08:36
Of course.
01:08:38
How sexy did you think it was?
01:08:40
This one lost me a bit.
01:08:41
I gave it a two.
01:08:43
Still, I mean there's vibes.
01:08:46
You know, Bahamas.
01:08:48
You?
01:08:49
I gave it a one, because again, why are we starting at Christmas?
01:08:52
What's happening here?
01:08:55
Jaws is summer, period.
01:08:58
Don't ever give me snow in a Jaws movie.
01:09:00
I swear to God I will come for you.
01:09:02
Yeah, just trying to be contrary.
01:09:04
Yeah, anyways, I give it a one and the path of point is purely for Jake.
01:09:09
Is that the character?
01:09:10
I liked him.
01:09:11
how fucked up did you think he was?
01:09:13
Point five.
01:09:15
Kinda same thing, not that I hadn't
01:09:18
Yeah, .5, this one also had the lowest kill count.
01:09:21
Yeah, nobody's even dying.
01:09:24
Overall, Jaws 4.
01:09:26
This movie sucked.
01:09:28
I get the hate with this one.
01:09:30
I was so bored watching it.
01:09:32
There's a couple of scenes that I'm like, my God, that was kind of fun though.
01:09:36
And while I appreciate Lorraine Gary coming out of retirement to act in this, I wish she had not.
01:09:45
I just can't let a telepathic relationship with a shark slide.
01:09:52
So it's a 1.5.
01:09:54
Mm-hmm.
01:09:56
And really, all of that is for because it's a shark movie.
01:10:01
Yeah.
01:10:02
I don't think that any shark movie would be less than a 1.5 because it's sharks.
01:10:07
How about you?
01:10:09
I can let a telepathic relationship with a shark slide.
01:10:13
I think that's hilarious.
01:10:15
What I wish they would have done was just leaned into it all the way.
01:10:19
This is an insane premise where the sun shark is coming after a family.
01:10:26
miles and miles away to torment them and to get his vengeance.
01:10:31
And I think that's hilarious, but they didn't really lean into that.
01:10:34
I do love the part at the end where it roars and where she is having flashbacks to situations that she was not there for.
01:10:42
I think that's really funny.
01:10:44
And yeah, if they had leaned into the camp vibe for the rest of it, I probably would have liked it a lot more.
01:10:49
But unfortunately, they didn't.
01:10:50
So it's mainly just boring and then like five minutes of very funny scenes.
01:10:56
So for that reason, it is a 1.5.
01:10:59
Yeah.
01:11:01
Well, let's rank it with our hearts now.
01:11:06
Now we rank the films with our hearts.
01:11:09
You first.
01:11:11
Jaws.
01:11:12
Jaws 3D.
01:11:15
Jaws the Revenge.
01:11:16
Jaws 2.
01:11:18
That's the order that I rank them because that's, well, I might watch Jaws 3D over Jaws, depending on my mood.
01:11:25
But typically, that's the order in which I would want to watch them again.
01:11:30
Okay.
01:11:32
Jaws 3D is the runaway winner for me.
01:11:36
I will rewatch this movie immediately.
01:11:39
It's gonna be my next Saltburn if you don't know.
01:11:44
I watch Saltburn every day to go to bed for a year and a half.
01:11:49
Yeah, it was a lot.
01:11:50
Yeah, and Jaws 3D is gonna be that next, that's gonna be that movie for me.
01:11:54
As absolutely.
01:11:56
Then Jaws 2, then Jaws, and then Jaws the Revenge.
01:12:03
I don't think that one five minutes of a movie makes it rewatchable.
01:12:08
I'll just rewatch that five minutes on YouTube.
01:12:11
Yeah, but when I rewatch movies, I'm rarely paying that much attention anyway, so I can just like tune in for that.
01:12:17
I'm not tuning into anything for Jaws 2, you know what I mean?
01:12:20
So.
01:12:21
even the like explosion and...
01:12:25
What do you care about in the first Jaws?
01:12:29
What do you care about in the first Jaws that Jaws 2 doesn't have?
01:12:33
It has tension, has story building, it has beautiful cinematography.
01:12:40
It's a fantastic film,
01:12:43
Jaws 2 has those things.
01:12:46
No, not as good.
01:12:48
I'm glad you like it, but you're the only one.
01:12:53
Yeah.
01:12:55
Alright, would you survive?
01:12:58
Yeah.
01:12:59
Yeah, I almost just nixed this entire segment because I was like, obviously we're surviving.
01:13:04
Neither of us are trying to kill a shark.
01:13:07
Yeah, and I'm not getting on a boat.
01:13:09
I'll get on a boat, not if this vengeance is after me.
01:13:13
Vengeance.
01:13:15
I'll get on a boat for whale watching only.
01:13:16
That's the only reason you're getting me on a boat.
01:13:18
Well, actually I'll go kayaking, but that's different.
01:13:21
But like in the ocean, I'm going whale watching and that's it.
01:13:25
Okay, yeah.
01:13:27
Anyways, yeah, this is maybe one of the easiest movies to survive.
01:13:30
Just don't go in the water.
01:13:31
It's super easy.
01:13:34
My apartment complex has a pool, so...
01:13:37
done.
01:13:38
Yeah.
01:13:39
Beach days are a pain in the ass.
01:13:40
You get sand everywhere and your food gets too warm to eat and you know.
01:13:46
Yeah.
01:13:47
But I mean, we're on the West Coast, so maybe it's different over there on the East Coast.
01:13:53
I wouldn't know.
01:13:55
Never swam in the East Coast?
01:13:57
I don't think so.
01:13:59
I've seen the Atlantic Ocean with my eyes, but I don't think I've ever swam in it.
01:14:05
That was a big deal for me.
01:14:06
Can I tell you secret?
01:14:08
You have.
01:14:10
when we went to Mexico.
01:14:13
We've swam in the Atlantic Ocean together.
01:14:16
yeah.
01:14:17
I forget that that's down there.
01:14:19
Yeah, me too.
01:14:20
Thank you.
01:14:21
Well.
01:14:22
Rico too.
01:14:24
I swim in that ocean.
01:14:27
Damn, I forget that's not...
01:14:30
That's the Caribbean Sea.
01:14:33
It's not the Atlantic Ocean.
01:14:37
Yeah, it is.
01:14:39
I feel like they're separate.
01:14:40
Like true Atlantic Ocean is cold and dreary.
01:14:43
And then the Caribbean Sea is like fun.
01:14:46
Paradise tropical.
01:14:48
That's like comparing San Diego Beach to the Alaskan beach.
01:14:52
It's the same ocean.
01:14:53
One's not gonna feel the same.
01:14:57
Thank you.
01:14:57
Okay.
01:15:01
Yes, I thought about it for three seconds and I thought, got her.
01:15:05
Yeah.
01:15:06
All right, do you want to predict next week's movie?
01:15:10
All right, this is actually one that you picked out of a lineup.
01:15:13
I gave you three options.
01:15:14
You chose this one.
01:15:16
So next week, we're going to be talking about Eden Lake.
01:15:19
Oh, summertime, summertime.
01:15:23
summertime.
01:15:24
Yay.
01:15:26
Eden Lake is about, I have to like quickly think of all the movies that we've seen recently because I know you wouldn't put anything even remotely similar to any of those
01:15:38
movies.
01:15:40
Sure.
01:15:40
Okay?
01:15:42
Except the summertime vibes.
01:15:45
Obviously.
01:15:47
we've got to the summertime vibes.
01:15:49
Yes, so it's about
01:15:54
It's about a family that un...
01:16:00
but known to them goes to what they think is Eden Lake, but they actually, no, they think that they're going to a different lake, but what they actually go to is Eden Lake.
01:16:12
They make a wrong turn and they get there and they're like, wow, this doesn't look the same as last year.
01:16:18
It looks a little different.
01:16:18
Isn't that strange?
01:16:20
And they go to their cabin and they go inside their cabin and it's just like a little off, you know?
01:16:27
And when they're in the cabin,
01:16:29
weird stuff happens like you know like there are no controls in the wrong place or the mailbox is left open or like a door is left open or whatever yes and everybody in the
01:16:45
house is getting like freaked out because they think that somebody's in the house well yeah so it turns out that there are people in the house
01:16:56
but in another dimension.
01:16:59
Like The Lake House, starring Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock.
01:17:04
I liked that movie when it came out, I didn't remember that was what it was about.
01:17:10
Yeah, kind of.
01:17:12
There's a mailbox scene in that one too, isn't there?
01:17:13
Oh, I literally just gave the plot of the lake house.
01:17:19
I didn't re- I didn't- I genuinely didn't remember that movie until right now.
01:17:23
Well, still plagiarism.
01:17:26
No, please.
01:17:28
I can finally go to jail.
01:17:30
Mm-hmm.
01:17:32
Yeah, so that's what it's about.
01:17:32
It's an alternate universe, alternate dimension, and they're all coexisting together, but it's really scary.
01:17:40
And Sandra Bullock's not in it.
01:17:43
It's so different from The Lake House.
01:17:45
it's as different as you could possibly get from the lake house.
01:17:49
Yeah.
01:17:50
You can see why I got confused.
01:17:53
They do both have the word lake in it, so it's fair.
01:17:56
Yeah, well, not really, no.
01:18:01
I didn't even get to think about that one.
01:18:03
Sometimes off the cuff is more fun, you Because then you just give me the plot to the lake house.
01:18:09
m
01:18:11
Shoot.
01:18:13
Yeah, well, we're gonna talk about it next week.
01:18:16
I'll let you go in blind.
01:18:18
I will go and bind.
01:18:19
I enjoy that.
01:18:20
Yeah.
01:18:22
Okay, well, this is fun.
01:18:24
Longest episode yet.
01:18:26
This was.
01:18:27
Well, I haven't edited it yet.
01:18:29
Yeah.
01:18:30
Alright, well I'm glad that we finally covered Jaws, the franchise.
01:18:35
Me too, I'm glad we didn't use it to celebrate Shark Week because it's doing more harm to sharks than Jaws did.
01:18:41
How dare they?
01:18:42
Happy 50th anniversary to Jaws.
01:18:47
And...
01:18:48
Sorry, Steven Spielberg, she hated it.
01:18:51
my god.
01:18:51
Yeah.
01:18:52
All right.
01:18:52
Well, we'll see you next week when we talk about the lake house.
01:18:57
Nope.
01:19:00
We'll see you next week when we talk about Eden Lake.
01:19:03
In the meantime, give us your rankings on Jaws.
01:19:06
Tell us if you're going to see it in theaters, because I think it's re-releasing some places.
01:19:11
Tell us what your favorite breed of shark is.
01:19:14
Like, subscribe, comment.
01:19:17
Please come back next week.
01:19:19
We beg you.
01:19:21
Yeah.
01:19:23
right, see you then.
01:19:25
Bye.
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